I write today to tell you a story! Ahem, ahem....
I have been inspired by a book I recently read. It is called
More to Your Story, by the Zwicks. I highly recommend it :) The Zwick's share experiences from their lives and what they learned from those experiences, and they encourage the readers to do the same. I am taking that invitation and will share with you an experience I had recently that has changed me and strengthened me.
I had a great summer filled with work, a family vacation, various activities, and new friendships. As summer began to close and my internship drew near, I began to feel more and more anxious about life. I felt so unqualified for my upcoming internship and thought of every possible thing that could go wrong during it. I would be teaching middle school - a new and unexpected path for the next year of my life. As I began attending conferences and trainings to prepare for the school year, my anxiety grew worse, and pretty soon I couldn't sleep and then I couldn't eat. The weekend before school was to start, my parents happened to be in town, so Friday night I said, "Hey! What are you doing tonight? Oh, babysitting the grandkids? Can I come over?" I did just that and it was much needed. I expressed my concerns to my parents while sitting outside on the porch swing on this beautiful summer day. At the moment, life didn't feel so beautiful or summery. It seemed heavy and filled with fear- who wants that? Especially on a beautiful summer day!! This is Lexi we are talking about..
I didn't feel so Lexi at the moment. I felt a fear inside of me I don't think I have ever felt. I KNEW that the Lord had guided me to this internship through a series of obviously non-coincidental events. I knew that everything about the internship seemed perfect. I knew that I had experienced several reassurances that this was what I needed to do. So, why the fear??
I have heard that right before worthy and righteous things, comes opposition. I was feeling that opposition pretty bad. But, the help I needed came. God knows what we need and when we need it. That evening on the porch, I needed my parents to talk with me for a few hours to work through the feelings I was having. Through their logic, experience, and love, my fear subsided after a couple hours and I was able to feel lighter. My dad gave me a Priesthood blessing of comfort that was very helpful. Things looked bright again even though I was still concerned about my internship.
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Now, it's been almost two months since that evening, and I cannot explain how I have gotten here. It has been one tender mercy after another helping me get guest speakers, create lesson plans, receive answers to my questions, and find joy in my students and the work. I love my internship. It is challenging and exciting. My students are a joy. The Lord has lifted and carried me these past couple months to do things I never thought I could do. Each day, worries and fears still creep in, but through my experiences with the hand of the Lord these past couple months, I know that He can take care of things for us.
I am not the greatest story-teller or writer, but I do have experiences worth sharing. And, I am grateful for what I learn from them. From this experience, I have learned that God takes care of His children. If He asks us to do it, He will make it possible. Worry, doubt, and fear will come, but the Lord will help you through it- whether through a talk with parents or some other way.
We CAN trust Him.
We CAN do what HE asks. And, I believe we will be better because of it.